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THE  LIBRARY 

OF 

THE  UNIVERSITY 

OF  CALIFORNIA 

LOS  ANGELES 

GIFT  OF 

Kenneth  Macgowan 


8061  "IZ  'NVI  IW 
■jiI^O  'ao;Ji3o;s 

•3UI  ''SOJa  p.lOjXBQ 

jspuig 

junoLUoqjn 


I'll 


NO    PLAYS    EXCHANGED. 


5aher'5  Edition 
^  or  Pl7\y>3  e 


e  Obstinate  Family 


Price,  15  Cents 


••rrRISHT,  1M«,  BY  WALTIR  M.  BAKM  4  •» 


CHARACTERS. 

(Theatre  Royal,  Sadler's  Wells,  February  2lst,  1853.) 

Mr.  Harwood,  Harford's  father-in-law, Mr.  Barrett. 

Mns.  llxRwooiy,  Harford  s  moiher-in-law, Mrs.  1£.  Marston. 

Henry  Harford, Mr.  F.  Robinson. 

Jessy  Harford,  his  uife, Miss  T.  Bassano. 

J AiiiKS,  Harford's  servant, Mr.  Lewis  Ball. 

Lucy,  a  servant Miss  Eliza  Travers. 

SCENE. — A  Villa  at  Richmond. 

COSTUMES  OF  THE  DAY. 

Time  in  Representation,  Forty  Minutes. 


THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY. 


SCENE. — A  room  t'm  Harford's  VM'i,  with  windows  to  the  ground,  leadiiig 
on,  to  the  Lawn,  with  view  of  the  cotintry  heynnd—A  table  partly  laid  for 
luncheon,  c. — Side-table  with  nevjspaper,  L.  c. — Sofa,  k.  c. — Eight  chairs 
— Doors  B.  2  E.  and  L.  2  E. — .4.3  the  curtain  ascends,  James  is  discovered 
humming  an  air,  and  placing  the  chairs  round  the  table. 

Lucy  (without,  L.  H.).  James,  James,  open  the  door ! 

f  James  opens  the  door,  l.  2  e.  and  Lucy  enters  with  a  dish  in  each  hand, 
^  L.  2  E.) 

James.    Allow  me  to  assist  you. 

(Jb/ies  a  di^hfrom  hir,  and,  a?  she  places  the  other  on  the  table,  he  passes  his 
arm  around  her  waist  and  kisses  her — ^Vie  crosses  to  R.) 

Lucy  (r).  James,  fie,  sir  I  What  if  any  one  should  see  you  ? 

James  (l.).  Is  there  any  chance  of  that? 

Lucy.     Yes,  master  may  pop  in  any  minute  from  V.:e  garden. 

Jam3S.  But  consider,  Lucy,  my  name  is  Bunks,  and  that  you  face- 
tiously call  me  the  busy  B;  consequently,  iu  my  ilittiiiKS  about,  I'm 
privilcf^ed  to  sip  tlie  honeyed  sweetness  from  off  those  lips. 

Lucy.     I've  no  objection  to  that,  James,  but  if  master  saw  you — 

James.     "Well,  wliat  if  he  did  ? 

Lucy.     I  phould  expire  for  very  shame,  James. 

Jamss.  Why  ?  he  kisses  his  wife  often  enough,  for  lie  has  only 
been  married  three  months. 

Lucy.     Yes,  ids  wife.    Now,  if  you  were  my  husband — 

James.     Ah  I  how  lon<i  will  it  be  before  1  am  ? 

"Lncy  {si  (jhing).     Goodness  only  knows! 

James  {emhracivg  her).  At  all  events,  longer  than  you  have  any  de- 
sire to  wait.  {Placing  hisarin  aroxnd  her  ^vaist.) 

Lucy  (breaking  away).  Don't  s;.eak  so  certain  of  what  you  know 
notiilng  about. 

(Both  arrange  the  table,  fetching  glasses,  etc.,  from  side-table.  Henry  Har- 
¥ORD  comes  from  the  lawn,  remains  at  the  window  unperceived,  and  listens.) 

3 


572614 


4  THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY. 

Iiucy.     Master's  father  and  mother-in-law  are  roming  to  InneVieott. 
James.     Yes,  and  to  rejoice  lu  the   happiness  of  tiie  young  couple. 
Lucy,  I  can't  say  taat  I  can  give  you  a  father-in-law. 
Lucy.     That  is  of  no  consequence. 

James.    Besides,  T  think  we  should  find  ourselves  quite  sufficient  fof 
one  another,  without  fathers  or  mothers  in-law.     There,  thank  goodness^ 
the  table  is  spread  ! 
Lucy.     Ye*5. 
James.     What? 
Lucy.     Nothing.  I  said  yes. 

James.     Well, that  is  nothing.   {Aside.)  I'll  come  the  authoritative. 
[Aloud.)   You  must  also  say  that —     ( Tliey  come  forward.) 
Lucy.     Say  what? 

James.     "  Tiiauk  goodness,  the  table  is  spread." 
Lucy.     Why? 

Jamas.     Why— he-cause — be-cause — you  must. 
Lucy.     How  stupid. 

James.     When  one  has  finished  anything  it  is  customary  and  proper 
to  say — thank  goodness  that  is  finished. 
Lucy.     Go  along  with  your  nonsense. 

James.     It  is  not  nonsense.    Y^ou  must  not  have  such  a  will  of  yonr 
own,  Lucy.  [Softly.)  Now,  there's  a  dear,  do  say  thank  goodness,  the 
tahle  is  spread. 
Lucy.     No! 

James.     If  you  love  me,  do! 
Lucy.     I  won't. 

Jamas  [gelling  avgry).  You  won't? 
Lucy.     I  won't. 

James,     When  I  a^^k  you  to  do  anything,  can  you  say  no  ? 
Lucy.    Y^es,  yes  !  and  if  you  were  ti)  ask  me  ten  times,  I'd  still  do  so. 
James.    Wliat  am  1  to  think  of  that  ? 
Lucy.     Whatever  you  please. 

James.     Allow  me  to  ask  tea   limes  and  still  be  ansvyered  in  the 
negative! 

Lucy.     Yes,  if  vou  were  to  ask  anything  so  foolish. 
James.     It  is  not  foolish,  but  that  is  not  the  question  now;  you 
shall  say  it  simply  because  I  wish  it! 
Lucy.     I  won't  say  it. 
James  (in  a  th'eatening  tone).  Lucy  ! 
Lucy  [imiialing  him).  James! 
James.     Now,  you  must  say  it. 
Lucy.     I  must,  must  I  ?  , 
J p.nies  [decidedly).   Y''es!  I  command  it. 

Lucy.     Why,  surely  the  man  is  dreaming,  or  got  out  of  bed  wrong 
foot  foremost  thio  morning ! 

James.    No  joking — I'm  in  earnest.    Y'ou  shall  say,  "  Thank  good- 
ness, the  table  is  spread." 


THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY.  5 

liucy.     I  sluiU  and  must,  eh? 
James.     Yes,  yi  u  shall  and  must. 
Lucy.     jSow,  tlien,  1  won't  do  it. 

James  (tnjin;/  to  keep  down  his  anger).  Lucy,  I  beg  you  will. 
Lucy.     1  won't. 

James.    For  the  last  time  I  ask  you. 

Lucy.  I  u  on'l — 1  won  t,  no,  not  even  if  you  were  to  stand  upon  your 
head  and  ask  nie. 

James.     We  shall  see! 

{They  walk  across  the  stage  angrily.) 

liMcy  {folding  her  arm^).     Well,  we  sliall  see  ! 

James  (angrily  snaking  his  finger  ill  h'T  fane}.  You  will  refuse  my 
request,  and  will  perversely  persist  in  your  obstinacy. 

Lucy.   Y^es,  yes ! 

James.  Let's  try.  {Takes  hold  of  her  wrists.)  Now,  then,  say  it- 
say,  "  Thunk  goodne.-s,  the  table  is  spread  I" 

Lucy.  Oil,  oil!  ( Breaks  aw<iy.)  Oh!  you  brute — to  squeeze  mc  sol 
but,  1  haven't  said  it. 

Jamas.    Well,  consider  everything  at  an  end  between  us  I 

Lucy.    Very  well,  sir ! 

James.   And  can  yon  give  me  up  so  easily  ? 

Lucy.    Yes,  if  you  are  such  a  stupid. 

James  {scornfully).  But,  you  can  yet  prove  yourself  to  be  more 
than  woman  by  not  continuing  obsthiate,  and  saying  it ! 

Lucy.    Cut,  I  wont!  I  won't  I  I  won't!     There  then. 

James  (passionately).     Then  go  to {Bell  rings.) — your  mistress's 

room,  for  that  is  her  bell ! 

Lucy  {going).     I've  not  finished  with  you  yet,  my  gentleman. 

James  (rims  after,  and  takes  hold  of  her  dress).  Now,  Lucy,  "  Thank 
goodness,  the  table  is  spread  !" 

IjVLcy  {stamps  her  foot).     No!  (7szi<  R.  2  E.) 

James.  Obstinacy — as  I  think  a  distant  relation  of  the  King  of 
Denmark  says  in  the  play—"  thy  name  is  woman."  Request !  entreatv  ! 
threatening!  force  !  ail,  all  in  vain !  If  I  was  to  tell  her  that  I  would 
kill  her,  I  wonder  if  she  would  say  it! 

Henry  {coming  forward).  Whether  she  would  or  no,  pray  let  her 
live. 

James.  Sir,  I  did  mt  think — You've  heard 

Hen.  Something  of  your  and  Lucy's  dispute,  yes.  She  is  an  obsti- 
nate girl,  James. 

James.  Yes,  sir ;  but  otherwise  she  is  an  uncommon  nice  young 
woman.     But  I  can't  tell  whit  is  in  the  girl's  head  to  day. 

Hen.  That  is  a  problem  that  the  wisest  have  been  unable  to  solve, 
SO  don't  bother  yourself  about  it ;  but  go  and  see  to  the  wine. 

{Retires  up  K.) 


6  The  obstinate  faMIlT. 

James  (crosses  to  i..,  aside).  I  must  be  firm,  she  shall  and  must  say 
it,  "  Tliank  goodness,  the  table  is  spread." 

(Exit  L.  2  E.) 

Hen.  I  think  that  was  my  wife's  bell,  so  she  must  have  come  in  from 
her  walk.     Ah,  here  she  is  I 

{Enter  Jessy  r.  2  e.) 

— Your  Widk  has  done  you  good,  love  ;  you  have  got  quite  a  color,  and 
look  cliarraing. 

Jes.  Flattery  !  but  Henry  you  must  really  give  it  up.  Recollect,  we 
have  been  married  for  three  months,  so  that  it  is  time  you  should  ap- 
pear in  the  character  of  a  husband,  and  give  up  2)laying  the  jiart  of  a 
lover. 

Hen.   Do  you  desire  that  ? 

Jes.  W!iy,  ail  tlie  world  says  that  you  men  change  with  marriage, 
and  I  must  make  up  my  mind  to  put  up  witli  it,  and  tiie  longer  you 
delay  making  this  change  the  greater  difficulty  I  shall  have  in  recon- 
ciling myself  to  it  when  it  does  happen. 

Hen.  But  you  shall  never  find  any  difference  in  my  conduct,  dear 
wife.     I  sliall  never  change,  precious  ! 

Jes.  >>ind  I  will  never  give  you  cause  to  do  so,  darling !  (Shaking 
hunits  very  cnrdially.) 

Hen.  I  believe  you  are  the  dearest  creature  on  earth,  and  you  ful- 
fill my  every  wish  almost  before  I  give  them  utterance. 

Jes.  And  do  you  not  tlie  same  for  me?  (They  seat  themselves,  she 
takes  tip  her  imrk  )  I  wonder  where  my  father  and  motlier  can  be,  1 
have  not  seen  them  for  nearly  a  fortnight,  and  I  so  long  to  see  them. 

Hen.  (playing  icith  her  work).     Do  you  miss  them,  my  dear? 

Jes.    You  never  thought  when  you  asked  that. 

Hen.  No,  no  ! — I  was  thinking  of — (Laughs) — something  that  hap- 
pened just  now. 

Jes.   Well,  what  was  it  ? 

Hen.  Somethiui;  comic  in  the  extreme!  As  I  stepped  in  from  tlie 
lawn,  I  heard  Lucy  and  James  amusing  themselves  with  tlie  great  con- 
versational powers  with  which  they  are  gifted— out  of  curiosity  I  lis- 
tened. When  tliey  had  finished  laying  the  ta'ile,  .lame's,  in  a  self-sat- 
isfied manner,  viewed  the  whole  arrangement.s,  and  made  use  of  tiie 
natural  expression,  "  Thank  goodness,  the  table  is  spread,"  and  as  Lucy 
had  also  been  engaged  in  the  work,  he  desired  I'cr  to  show  lier  thank- 
fulness for  the  completion  of  the  task  by  making  use  of  the  same  ex- 
pression. 

Jes.    Rather  imperious! 

Hen.  Lucy  refused  to  sny  it — James  insisted  on  it — and  out  of  this 
arose  a  quarrel — James  endeavored  to  compel  her — while  she  continued 
peremptorily  to  refuse.     Very  obstinate  of  Lucy,  wasn't  it,  dear? 


THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY.  7 

Jes.   It  is  rather  difficult,  dear,  to  say  which  of  the  two  was  most 

obstinate. 

Hen.   But  lie  begged  her  to  do  it. 

Jes.    But  it  was  such  a  iooli.sh  request. 

Hen.  But  so  insiguilicant-  that  no  justification  can  be  found  for  her 
obstinate  refusal 

Jes.  {more  warmhj).  Even  as  little  as  one  can  find  for  Ajs  obstinately 
j)er-i.sting  in  requesting  her  to  say  it 

Hen  Kow  do  nut  let  us  quarrel  about  it  !  nnlbing  of  tlie  kind  can 
ever  liappen  to  us — for  I  am  sure  if  i  was  u>  request  auyihing  of  }qu — 
you  would  not  refuse  me! 

Jes.  ((ioubtin(f[y).     Hian,  bunnl 

Hen.  {decidtdly).  I  am  quiie  convinced  you  would  do  whatever  I 
asked  you 

Jes.   But  what  if  I  di<l  not? 

Hen.  What  if  you  did  not?  why,  that  is  without  the  verge  of  prob- 
ability, so  1  won't  speak  of  it.     I  would  bet  anything 

Jes.     Do  not  bet. 

Hen.     Let  us  put  it  at  once  to  the  test. 

Jes    [rj'i.ickly).     Pray  don  t !   Fr;iy  don't  ! 

Hen.  Pooh,  nonsense  !  Dear  .Jessv,  1  retjuest  that  you  will  say — 
•'  Thank  go.idness,  the  table  is  spread  !" 

Jes.     Do  not  he  so  childish. 

Hen.  Now.  dear  wife,  1  beg  you  will!  do  say — "Thank  goodness, 
the  tdlile  is  spread  !' 

Jes.  [striufgl  LUfi  with  herself).  Wliat  a — what  a  foolish  request  I 
{Hexitutingly.)  No,  no  !  I  will  not  say  it. 

Hen.     Do,  do  say  it. 

Jes.     No — no. 

Hen.  (rather  ivnrmly).     You  won't  say  it  ? 

Jes.  (decidedly).     No! 

Hen.  {rining  slowly  from  the  table).  And  can  you  refuse  what  I  re- 
quest ? 

Jes.  {rifiing).     But  it  would  be  so  childish  to  say  it ! 

Hen.  Childish  or  not.  that's  not  the  puiut  — ii  is,  whether  you  will 
or  will  not  fulfill  my  request? 

Jes      Y  u  nre  wrong  in  making  p-uh  a  request. 

Hen.     And  you  act  wrongly  ju  refusing  to  do  what  T  request. 

(  r.ieij  bec.nvii  more  firm  and  decided.) 

Jes.  T  act  wrougly  ?  That  is  the  first  time  that  you  have  ever  said 
such  a  thing  I 

Hen.  it  is  also  the  first  time  that  you  have  refused  what  I  re- 
quested I 

Jes.  And  it  is  the  first  time  that  you  have  ever  requested  anything 
so  thoughtless  and  childish  I 

Hea.    Thoughtless — childish !     Is  that  the  language  of  love  ? 


8  THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY. 

Jes.     Can  he  who  loves  entreat  anything  bo  foolish  of  her  he  loves? 
Hen.     Entreat,  Mrs.  Harford?     1  have  only  requested  I 

Jes.     Well,  if  you  should  entreat 

Hen.     Then 

Jes.     If  you  should  entreat 

Hen.     Then,  of  course,  you  would  not  refuse  me  ! 
Jes.     Yes,  even  then  1  would  ;  for  if  you.  entreated  such   a  thing  of 
me,  you  would  lessen  me  in  my  own  esteem.     No,  I  will  not  say  it. 

{Goes  up  to  a  side-table  and  rings  bell.) 

Hen.  Good  gracious,  how  angry  you  have  become !  How  decidedly 
you  oppose  yourself  to  me  I  Is  this  the  tone  that  a  wife  should  use  to 
her  liusband? 

Jes.  Is  such  a  foolish  request  such  a  one  as  it  becomes  a  husbani 
to  ask  of  his  wife  ? 

{Enter  Lucy,  r.  h.) 

Jes.     Lucy,  I  left  my  handkerchief  in  my  bedroom. 

{Exit  Lucy  k.  h.) 

Hen.     Jessy,  do  not  drive  this,  which  was  at  first  a  jest,  too  far. 
Jes.     Do  I  do  so  ?     No,  sir  ;  it  is  you  who  cbnnge  jetl  into  earnest 

[Seats  herself,  and  hastily  snatches  up  her  work.) 

(Enter  J AfiESy  Ti.  Tl.  with  decanters,  which  he  places  on  the  table.  Lucv 
enters  k.  h.  with  handkerchief,  which  she  gives  to  Jessy;  she  then  passi'S 
James,  who,  in  panloinime,  asks  her  if  she  will  fulfill  his  req'ieM;  she,  in 
pantomime,  refuses,  and  exits  L.  H. — J ames  follows  quickly,  after  shaking 
his  fist — Jessy  continues  working,  with  her  back  to  the  table  ) 

Hen.  {who  has  been  looking  on  to  the  lawn,  comes  forward,  seats  himself, 
and  takes  up  the  newspaper,  reads  for  a  short  time,  then  looks  over  it  at  J  essy, 
throws  it  down,  goes  to  her  and  gently  says).  Well,  have  you  thought  over 
it?     W^ill  you  give  up  being  obstinate? 

Jes.  {quickly  throwing  her  work  away).  How,  Mr.  Harford,  obstinat'?? 
You  know  if  there  is  any  word  that  I  detest  it  is  tl-at!  I  am  not  ob- 
stinate— and  most  especia'ly  not  so  in  the  present  instance — but  }  ou 
are,  for  so  obstinately  persisting  in  so  foolish  a  request. 

Hen.  But,  Jessy,  dear,  understand  me;  it  is  noton  this  foolish  re- 
quest I  lay  any  stress,  but  only  on  your  fulfilling  my  desire. 

Jes.     Well,  if  it  is  so,  I  request  you  will  not  mentis  rn  it  again. 

Hen.  But  my  request  was  first  made,  and  iherefure  must  fir-t  beat- 
tended  to.  I  should  not  liave  thought  it  possible  that  you  could  liave 
refused  me  anything 

Jes.  (rising).  Indeed!  I  must  never  say  no— always  yes,  yes,  yes. 
1  see,  you  are  like  all  the  rest  of  your  sex  ;  you  do  not  desire  to  have  a 
loving  wife — a  tender,  true,  and  impartial  helpmate — no,  you  desire 
that  your  wife  should  be  your  slave. 


4 


THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY.  d 

Hen.  My  deir,  you  surprise  me.     "What  exaggeration  is  this  ? 

Jes.  No,  mi,  bir,  with  your  demand  for  implicit  obedience  com- 
mences our  subjection.  But  I  never  will  be  made  a  slave — no,  never  !  I 
haven't  read  "  Uncle  Tom's  Cabin  "  for  nothing.  1  will  assert  and  de- 
fend my  riglits,  and  neither  threatening  nor  force  shall  bring  me  under 
subjection 

Hen.     And  "  lie  shall  be  thy  master." 

Jes.  There,  there,  sir,  was  I  not  right?  Fom  will  be  the  master, 
liheslave — you  will  command,  I  must  obey.  I  understand  and  per- 
ceive your  desire  to  lord  it.  I  will  obey  you  in  all  that  is  reasonable, 
but  not  in  that  which  is  unreasomible. 

Hen.  (L.).  Those  are  expressions  never  used  to  one  whom' we 
esteem. 

Jes.  (r.).  Such  requests  are  likewise  never  made  to  one  whom  we 
esteem. 

Hen.     Yes,  but  a  jest 

Jes.  You  have  made  bitter  earnest  of  it.  {Cries.)  Not  a  quarter  of 
an  hour  ago  you  said  you  would  never  change,  and  now  there  you  stand 
as  cold  and  indifleretit  as  if  we  had  been  married  for  twenty  years. 

Hen.     Now,  now,  don't  cry — you  know  how  that  irritates  "me. 

Jes.  {sobbiiui).    I  can't  Jielp  it  if  your  condnct  forces  me  to  cry. 

Hen.  {ironically).  Ah  !  goodness  !  what  a  villain  I  have  already  be- 
come! I  force  you  to  cry!  Oh  !  wretched  and  much-to-be-pitied 
woman,  in  that  your  fate  has  linked  you  to  such  a  brute  ! 

Jes.  Goon!  go  on!— add  mockery  to  your  cruelly.  "Who  would 
have  thought  this  an  hour  ago?  I  was  so  joyous— felt  so  happy — and 
now 

Hen.  Do  you  think  there  are  no  unfortunate  women  in  the  world 
besides  yourself? 

(Jessy  continues  crying.) 

Hen.  (aside).  Oh  I  this  confounded  crying!  if  her  parents  should 
come  what  will  they  think  ?  (Aloud.)  Now,  wife,  now,  Jessy,  now  dear- 
est— come,  come,  let's  make  it  up. 

Jes.  (taking  her  handkerchief  from  hcr'e'/es).     "What,  make  it  up? 

Ken.  Yes,  it  is  foolish  that  we  ourselves  should  mingle  the  bitter 
with  our  happiness. 

Jes.  (softly).    Do  you  indeed  think  so  ? 

Hen.     No  one  can  have  less  cause  to  quarrel  than  we. 

Jes.  (gently  approaching  him).     And  yet  you  were  so  cruel. 

Hen.     Well,  well !  Now  here's  my  hand,  let's  make  it  up  ? 

Jes.  (slowly  placing  her  hand  in  his).  "Well,  there — yoi!  cruel  fellow 
for  tormenting  me  so. 

Hen.  (gently  embracing  her).  You  know,  darling,  T  wouldn't  torment 
you  for  the  world  ;  but  now,  dear,  as  you  love  me,  do,  now,  it'sall  over, 
just  say  those  few  words. 

Jes.  (quickly  withdrawing  herself ).    "What  I  again? 


XO  THE  OBSTINATF.  FAMILY. 

Hen.    You  won't? 

Jes.  {gently).    But,  ITenry 

Hen.     I  was  the  first  to  <,nve  way,  now  yon  must  complete  it. 

Jes  You  will  insist  on  it?  Y'>u  will  commence  this  quarrel 
ar  I  in? 

Hen.  And  yon,  I  know,  will  put  an  end  to  it.  Say  those  few  words 
aid  I'm  conleni. 

Jjs    [afli-r  nhoii  heulution).    Once  for  all — no! 

Hen.  No!  G-o^^d,  j;  lod— very  good!  You  know  that  this  trifle 
•"  •nld  please  me;  but  no.  you  won't  do  it.  It  may  be  obstinacy  on  my 
)ii  I  to  jier.sist  in  it;  b:it  love  would  put  up  with  such  obstinacy  and 
givfe  vv:u'  to  if.  You  will  itol  d  >  so.  T'lese  two  or  tliree  stupid  words 
are  nothing  in  themselves;  but  by  saying  i hem  you  would  give  me  a 
proof  of  your  lovi\     Go,  go,  and  never  moresav  tliat  you  love  me. 

(  Walh  angrily  up  and  doivn.) 

Jes.  You  accu'^e  me  of  obstinacv,  and  with  what  right?  You,  your- 
self, admit  thit  y  )ur  rc'(]!iest  is  fo  lish,  and  yntyou  insist  on  it.  {Gradu- 
ally relaxin  i  her  decided  tnne)  Js  that  hive?  You  see  th-t  your  re- 
quest pains  and  grieves  me.  i)nt  that  d<ies  not  aflect  yon.  Your  cruelty 
has  made  me  cry,  and  yjt  vou  nr^  indifferent.  On  whose  part,  then, 
is  there  rao-^t  obstmai-y  and  want  (  f  love? 

(Ew^er  James,  h.  2  E.) 

James.     Mr.  and  Mrs.  Harwooil  have  come,  sir ! 

{He  (hen  gooi  and  prepares  to  wait  at  table.) 

Hen.  {uneasy  and  sofdy).  Now,  hide  your  tears,  or  what  will  they 
think? 

Jes  I'm  sure  I  do  not  care  if  they  know  what  has  taken  place.  I 
am  quite  innocent. 

{Enter  Ma.  and  Mrs  Harwoop,  l.  2  e) 

H^n.     My  dear  sir.  I'm  delighted  to  see  you. 

Jes       Dearest  mother ! 

Mrs.  H.  I  must  scold  you,  daugiiter,  for  it  is  nearly  a  fortnight 
since  you've  be;.'n  to  see  me.  I  had  a  great  mind  not  to  come  this 
morniug. 

Jes      Dear  mother 

Mrs.  H  Yps  !— re^t  easv — T  know  a  young  wife  has  something  else 
to  d')  tha-i  to  tliink-  of  her  old  mother. 

Har.  The  wav  of  the  world — old  lady,  the  way  of  the  world — a  wife 
must  leave  her  fathe:-  a  ul  mother,  eh  ?  But  you  do  tiiink  of  us  some- 
times, don't  you,  my  girl  ? 

Jes.     Always    father,  always  ! 

Hen.  {anxiously  ivatrJiim  Jfssv).     Now,  shall  we  scat  ourselves? 

(Mrs.  H.  takes  a  chair  between  Hknhy  -jcnd  Jkssy.) 


The  obstinate  family.  u 

Star.  I've  nothing  to  say  against  it,  for  I'm  very  tired  and  very 
hungry. 

{SitH  L.  of  table  ) 

(Lucy  enters  and  places  a  dish  on  the  fable — James  iaks  hold  of  her,  and 
asks,  by  signs,  ivhciher  she  will  say  what  he  has  desired — She  krwcks  his 
hand  away,  by  siyiia  tef'if<es,  and  exit  L.  H.) 

Har.  Ila,  ha,  ha!  Wife,  you  have  put  yourself  betwixt  the  newlv 
married  couple.  That's  right,  for  if  they  sat  together  it  might  be 
pleasant  to  them,  but  very  wz/pleasant  to  the  rest  of  the  company. 
Now,  till  your  glasses,  and  liere  is — manv  sucii  davs  as  liie  present. 

Hen.     Hem! 

(Jessy  r.  of  table,  ivipes  her  eyes  and  se.tit  her  glass  down.) 

Har.     What's  the  matter?     You  do  not  seem  inclined  to  drink  that 

toast ;  and el),  girl ? — a  tear?    I  see,  a  little  titi! 

Hen.     James! 

(Motions  him  to  withdraw.) 
{Exit  James,  i..  n.) 

Mrs.  H,  {behind  table,  K.).  How  can  you  aslc  ?  Let  them  settle  it 
themselves. 

_  Hen.  (behind  table,  l.).     0]i  !  it  is  nothing,  a  trifle,  not  worth  men- 
tioning— and  dear  Jessy  is  somethin.2^  too  sensitive. 
^  Jes.  (hursling  into  tears).     Something  else  — accused  of  being  too  sen- 
sitive now  ! 

Hen.     At  least  in  the  presence  of  your  parents 

Mrs.  H.     Restrain  yourself,  Jessy,  dear. 

Jes.  I  know  It  is  wrong  to  pive  way  to  one's  feelings,  but  I  have 
had  too  great  a  cause,  and  cannot  help  it. 

Mrs.  H.     What!     Son-in-law!     Son-in-law! 

Har.  {who  has  continued  eativy).  Wife,  do  not  interfere  in  this,  it 
concerns  the  children  only.' 

Hen.  From  Jessy's  appearance  it  would  seem  a^  if  I  had  deeply  in- 
jured her.  Now,  you  yourselves  shall  judge — for  I'll  tell  you  the  whole 
affair. 

Har.  Don't  son,  don!t,  we  have  no  desire  to  interfere  in  the  quarrels 
of  married  people. 

{Eats.) 

Hen.     But  I  must  justify  myself. 

Har.  (eating).     J  t  ain't  necessary. 

Hen.     You  might  believe 

Har.     We  do  not  believe  anyihing. 

Mrs.  H.     But  pray  let  him ;  perhaps  it  may  lead  to  a  reconciliation. 

Hen.  I  heard  James,  this  morning,  when  he  and  Lucy  had  hiid  the 
cloth,  desire  her  to  say — "Thank  goodness,  the  table  is  spread  I"  and 


1^  THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILt. 

they  had  a  quarrel  because  she  would  not.  I  told  Jessy  this,  and  laugh- 
ingly added  that  she  had  not  such  a  will  of  her  own,  and  in  jest  asked 
her  to  say  it.  Slie  refused  with  tuch  decided  obstinacy  and  provoking 
perverseness  that  at  last  we  had  angry  words  about  it. 

Jes.  {in  tears).  There,  you  hear,  obstinacy,  perverseness,  sensitive- 
ness, reproached  with  all  this.  Now,  you  can  bear  witness  for  me  that 
1  never  was  obstinate. 

Har.    Why — no  girl — T  can't  exactly  do  that. 

Mrs.  H.  Now,  husband,  how  can  you  wrong  the  poor  child  so — she 
was  never  obstinate.  Be  calm,  Jessy,  dear — we  won't  interfere,  and  you 
will  soon  be  reconciled  to  one  another. 

Jes.    I  fear  not,  for  he  sti.l  insists  on  my  saying  it. 

Mrs.  H.  {astoninhed).  Wliat,  son-in-law,  do  you  still  mean  to  say 
th;it  you  insist  on  it? 

Hen.   Pray  let  the  matter  end. 

Har.  Yes,  let  it  end,  or  you  will  spoil  my  luncheon  and  disturb  my  di- 
gestion. You  are  a  foolish  girl.  Jessy  dear.  And,  son-in-law,  you  do 
right  in  gently  curbing  the  self-wilfulness  of  your  young  wife.  She 
will  be  soon  accustomed  to  it,  like  my  old  lady  there,  who  does  not  know 
the  meaning  of  tlie  word  refuse  when  I  ask.  And  if  I  were  to  request 
her  to  say,  "  Thnnk  goodness,  the  table  is  spread  !"'  she  would  say  it  im- 
mediately. 

Mrs.  H.   No,  slie  wouldn't,  though. 

Har.    What? 

Mrs.  H.   You  would  not  desire  it,  dear. 

Har.    But  s  ippositig  I  did  ? 

Mrs.  H.   Why,  then  I  wouldn't  say  it. 

Har.    I  sny,  old  lady,  are  you  in  earnest  ? 

Mrs.  H    Yes,  quite. 

Har.   You  will  refuse  to  fulfill  my  request  ? 

Mrs.  H.   Yes! 

Hen.   My  dear  sir,  this  is  folly.     Pray  speak  of  something  else. 

Har.  {rises).  Stop  a  minute,  son-in-law,  stop  a  minute.  I've  never 
seen  the  like  of  this  before,  and  now  I'll  see  the  end  of  it.  Elizabeth, 
dear,  now  just  say — "  Thank  goodness,  the  table  is  spread  '" 

Mrs.  H.   Leave  me  alone. 

Har.    Prav  say  it. 

Mrs.  H.   No  I 

Har.  Many  a  time  when  I  have  seen  a  well-spread  table  Fve  said  it, 
and  now  you  shall. 

Mrs.  H.   I  won't. 

Jes.    Dear  mother 

Har.    Elizabeth 

Mrs.  H.   No ! 

Har.   Dear  Elizabeth  I 

Mrs.  H.   No  I 

Har.    Lizzy,  dear  I  {AUrist.) 


THE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY.  13 

Mrs.  H.   Noll  won't  say  it  I 

Hen.    I  beg  that 

Har.   This  is  beyond  a  jest.     Will  you,  through  your  own  obstinacy, 

Bet  your  daughter  siicii  a  bad  example  ? 

Mrs.  H.    liere  we  have  another  example  of  past  ex[)erience — that 
the  men  always  side  together  when  they  have  the  sahjection  and  submis 
sion  of  woman  in  view.     The  father  even  takes  part  against   liis  own 
daughter. 

Har.  1  take  no  one's  part  except  my  own.  My  daughter's  and  her 
husband's  affuirs  do  not  concern  me.  1  have  only  lo  settle  with  you, 
and  I  desire  that  you  repeat  those  wonls. 

Mrs.  H.  Mr.  H. !  Mr.  H. !  how  can  you  ask  anything  so  foolish  of 
your  wife? 

Har.  Foolish  or  not,  that's  not  it.  This  rrq'iest  is  nothing  more  nor 
less  than  the  touchstoiie  of  obedience,  and  if  my  historical  knowledge 
serves  me  riglitly,  even  so  did  Gesler  hang  his lap  upon  a  pole, in  order 
that  the  Swi-s  miglit  greet  it.  This  was  the  touclistone  of  their  obedi- 
ence. 

Mrs.  H.  And,  Mr.  11.,  if  ray  histo;ic:d  knowledge  does  ditto  by  me, 
it  was  because  this  request  was  so  laughable,  looiibli,  and  unmanly  that 
the  Swiss  r^^vohed  ag  iin>t  their  oppressors. 

Jes     Right,  m  ;rum:i,  and  we  will  act  even  as  they  did. 

Mrs.  H.  Yes.  of  cnnr.-e  we  will,  my  own  child,  and  set  ourselves  in 
opposition  to  thtse  S'.-lf  elected  lords  of  creation. 

Jes.    We  are  wives;  but  not  s;d)missive  or  ii;feriors. 

Mrs.  H.  Among  the  Turks  women  may  Le  submissive  and  therefore 
inferiors — but  we,  tliank  goodness,  live  in  a  Christian  land  I 

Jes.  The  men  appear  to  desire  the  introduction  of  TurKish  customs, 
for  in  behavior  they  are  Turks! 

Mrs.  H.  {more  warralij).  But,  heaven  be  praised,  we  are  not  slaves, 
and  we  will  assert  our  rights ! 

Jes.  And  such  foolibii  requests  as  you  have  made  we  never  will  com- 
ply witli ! 

Mrs.  H.  -| 
and        \    No ;  never,  never,  never ! 

Jes.        j 

{They  both  retire  and  speak  together,  R.) 

Hen.    Father-in-law  ! 

Har.  Son-in-law,  we've  dropt  in  for  it.  The  worst  of  it  is  that  it 
has  thrown  me  out  with  my  luncheon,  and  when  I  do  not  make  a  good 
hmrlieon,  I  never  make  a  good  dinnc. 

Hen.   Notwithstanding,  we  must  give  in  to  them. 

Har.  My  dear  fellow,  i  d^n't  know.  This  is  a  quarrel  by  which 
neither  party  can  gain  anything.  I've  allowed  myself  to  be  irritated — 
got  into  a  bit  of  a  passion — but  the  si)ecimen  I  have  had  of  the  enemies' 
powers  and  the  difficulties  to  be  overcome  have  cooled  my  courage, 


14  TEE  OBSTINATE  FAMILY. 

and  I  feel  quite  peaceably  inclined.     Besides,  tlie  vomen  are  not  alto- 
gether wrong,  for  it  is  nearly  as  obstinate  to  [lersist  iu  our  demand  as  it 

is  for  tliem  to  persist  in  their  refusal ;  and 

(  Whispers — they  retire,  L.) 

Jes.  {advancing  r.).  If  I  had  at  first  for  a  moment  imagined  that  so 
much  would  have  come  of  Buch  a  trilie,  I  would  liave  considered  it  a 
je.-t,  and  as  such,  complied  with  it ;  but  now  1  cannot  do  so. 

Mrs.  H.  On  no  account ;  for,  if  you  were  to  do  so,  it  would  forevei 
subject  you  to  his  imperious  C(iiitrol. 

Jes.    He  shall  see  that  J  }:ave  a  firm  will. 

Mrs.  H.  \'ery  proper.  Do  not  give  way  a  single  inch.  My  husband 
may  ask  long  enough  be!ore  I \\  ill  give  in. 

Jes.   You  will  support  me,  dear  moiher,  will  you  not  ? 

Mrs.  H.  You  may  rely  on  that,  my  dear,  and  so  will  all  the  women 
of  England. 

{They  whisper.) 

Har.    The  most  prudent  always  give  in- 


Hen.    I  would  willingly  do  it,  but  honor- 


Har.  Pooh,  nonseu&e,  honor!  that  often  prevents  a  man  from  doing 
what  is  right.  A  jest  commeuced  the  quarrel,  and  let  a  jest  put  an  end 
to  it. 

Hen.   If  one  could,  by  a  jest Ah  I  I  think  I  see  the  way. 

{Exit  B.  H.) 

Har.  Come,  come,  a  truce  ;  your  allied  powers  are  too  strong  for  me. 
But  1  must  sirengilien  the  fortifications  in  case  of  the  worst.  {Sits.) 
Ail,  thank  goodnet>'<,  the  tiible  is  spread. 

Jes.    I)ear  niother,  sliall  we  also 

Mrs.  H.    Oh !  ycs,  yes,  do  not  let  their  folly  der>rive  us  of  our  lunch- 
eon. {S-at  Ihemsdves  R,  of  table.) 
{Re-enter  Henry,  k.,  with  two  shawls.) 

Hen.  I  come  to  make  peace,  and  let  tis  put  an  end  to  the  war.  I  ac- 
knowledge that  I  was  the  chief  cause  of  this  quarrel,  a):d  to  atone  for 
this,  I'll  make  you  a  present  of  one  of  these  shawls.  I  intended  to  have 
done  so  this  morning,  but  our  quarrel  drove  it  out  of  my  remembrance. 

Jes.  (a  little  ashamed).     Henry,  I  scarcely  knov.' 

Hen.    Come,  choose. 

Jes.   At  Huch  a  time . 

Hen.    Choose,  choose,  there's  a  good  girl. 

Jes.  {poiiUs  to  one  and  suddenly  vjithdraws  her  hand). 

Hen.  The  right  hand  one?  {Sheiiods — he  then,  puts  one  on  the  table 
and  the  other  over  her  shoulders  )  It  becomes  you  beautifully.  Kow  I 
have  come  three  parts  of  the  way. 


TEE  OnSTINA  TE  FA  MIL  T.  15 

Jes.   {after  a  mnmenfs   hcvtatiim,  goes   and  embraces  him).     "Thank 
goodness  { whimpers  in  his  ear),  the  table  is  si)read." 

{Embrace.) 
(James  enters  with  tray,  and  remains  ready  to  dear  table.) 

Har.   That's  right,  mv  children,  vou  have  verv  wisely  made  an  end 
of  It 

Hen     Peace  is  made. 

Jes.    Forever. 

Hen.    The  like  shall  not  happen  again. 

Jes.    No,  never! 

( They  go  up  R.) 
(Lucy  enters,  arranges  the  things  on  side  table,  L.  h.) 

Mrs.  H.  {who  has  examined  the  other  shawl,  taps  Mr.  H.  on  shoulder). 
Look  tlieie. 

Har.    Wliat? 

Mrs.  H.   Tliere's  a  shawl  left. 

Har.    Indeed  ! 

Mrs.  H     Will  you  effect  a  reconciliation  with  that? 

Har.  With  the  shawl  ?  No,  tliank  you,  that  is  a  little  too  dear  to 
suit  my  hook. 

Mrs.  H.   But  consider 

(James  and  Lucy  begin  to  clear  taoie.) 

Har.  No,  I  hope  to  effect  a  reconciliation  at  aciieaper  rate  than  that. 
It  is  all  very  well  for  a  young  husband  like  Harry  to  do  so,  but  when  he 
has  had  mr  experience  he  will  know  better. 

Mrs.  H.    You're  a  brute  ! 

{Tliey  retire  up  l.  ii.) 

Hen.  (r.  c).  James,  I  hope  you  have  brought  Lucy  into  a  state  of 
obedience. 

James,  (c.)     No,  sir,  it  is  not  to  be  done. 

Hen.    How  obstinate  of  yon,  Lucy. 

Lucy.    But,  sir {AdvunciHg,'R.c.) 

Jes.   You  mu!?t  give  way,  Lucy,  you  must  repeat  those  words. 

Lucy.    What,  you  know 

Jes.   Yes,  all. 

Har.  Yes,  Miss  Lucy,  you  have  been  the  cause  of  all  this  disturb- 
ance 

Mrs.  H  Yes,  it  is  all  through  you,  and  ;is  a  punisiiment  j'ou  must 
repeat  aloud — an^ I  before  us — '•  Thank  goodness,  tiie  table  is  spread!" 
{AH  laugh.)   Well? 

Har.    Now,  old  lady,  I  think  you  have  said  it. 

Mrs.  H.  {down  L.).     Dear,  yes.     Well,  there's  an  end  of  it. 

{Gives  him  her  hand.) 


16  THE  OBSTIXATE  FA^IILT. 

Hen.   Xow.  Lu 'v,  yen  alone  remain. 
Lucy.    Upon  my  word  1  caii'f,  sir. 

Jes.    Do  it,  and  in  three  weeks  I'll  see  you  are  married- 
Lucy.    Marritd  !  "  Tliank  goodness " 

{Jumping  with  glee  to  C.) 

All.    Well?— well? 

Lucy  {who  doss  not  perceive  what  she  has  said).    Well — what  ? 
All.   Go  on — on  ! 
Lucy.   Go  ? 

James.   Yes  dear,  do  say  the  rest ! 
Lucy.   Oh!  1  see  ! 
All.   Proceed— proceed ! 

Lucy.    But  it  is  so  difficult.    James,  stand  ready  to  catch  me  if  I 
should  faint. 

{Takes  a  long  breath.) 

All.    Now  out  with  it ! 
Lucy.   "  The  table  is  spread  !" 

{She falls  into  James's  arms,  c. — All  shout  "  Bravo !"  and  wave  their 

handkerchiefs.) 

Jes.sy.      Harford.       Lucy  m  James's  arms.       Mrs.  H.       Har. 

B.  Xi. 


CURTAIN. 


THE  LfBRARY 

UNIVERSITY  OP  rALIFOI?"'~i 


a.  W.  ^inero's  Paps 


TUP  IWAfilSTRATF  ^^^^^  ^^  Three  Acts.  Twelve  males,  four 
lUU  ITIAUIJIAAIL,    fg^j^ieg     Costumes,  modern;  scenery,  all 

interior.    Plays  two  hours  and  a  half. 

THE  NOTORIOUS  MBS.  EBBSKIITIl  ^r:Zj::ZJ£,. 

Costumes,  modern  ;  scenery,  all  interiors     Plr  ys  a.  lull  evening. 

THF  PRflFI  IfiATF  I*layinrourAc<.s  ^even  males,  five  females. 
lUL  fl^VlLilMAlL,  gge^gry,  three  interiors,  rather  elaborate  ; 
costumes,  modem.    Plays  a  full  evening. 

THE  SCHOOLMISTRESS  ZZi'^'o^^iZ'^.T:!^;^:;. 

three  interiors.    Plays  a  full  evening. 

THE  SECOND  MRS.  TANQDE8AY  ir,"/,:"™'.:.. 'ct* 

tumes,  modern  ;  scenery,  three  interiors.    Plays  a  full  evening. 

SWFFT  I  AYFNflFR    comedy  in  Three  Acts.    Seven  males,  four 
females.    Scene,  a  single  interior;  costumes, 
modern.     Plays  a  full  evening. 

THF  TI1V1FS    Comedy  in  Four  Acts.    Six  males,  seven  females. 
Scene,  a  single  interior ;  costumes,  modern.     Plays  a 
full  evening. 

THF  WFAKFR  SFX    comedy  in  Three  Acts.     Eight  males,  eight 
Illy    nL,    UX(U  tJLi       females.     Costumes,  modern ;  scenery,  two 
interiors.    Plays  a  full  evening. 

A  WIFF  WITHOUT  A  SIWII F  comedy  m  Three  Acts.  Five 
A   IT  ire   nilUUtl   A  ^mLrC    males,  four  females.    Costumes, 

niadern ;  scene,  a  single  interior.    Plays  a  full  evening. 


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